What a Difference a Week Makes!

Photo Credit: secretan.com
Photo Credit: secretan.com

Last week, I shared that I was coaching one of our elementary small group leaders in effectively leading her group.  (If you missed that post, you can read all about that here.)

This past Sunday, I sat in on the group again and saw something AMAZING.  The entire atmosphere in the group had been transformed – for the better.  Here’s what I observed:

A new routine was established.

Last week, I suggested that the leader establish a routine when the children arrive to the group after the large group teaching time.  She determined the following routine:  When you come to the small group area, grab your Bible and circle up on the floor.  So this week, the children who were there the week prior did just that – amazing!  Of course, the children who weren’t there didn’t know what to do but that takes me to my next observation…

The routine and simple guidelines were reviewed.

She asked me to review the routine and the guidelines with the group of nine children.  I began by praising the children who remembered what they were supposed to do when they came to the small group area.  Then I explained the routine to the children who were absent the week prior and why this routine was being implemented.

Then I explained the guidelines, which we’ve intentionally kept short, sweet and simple:

  • Respect the adult in charge. (I gave examples of what that looked like.)
  • Respect the other people in your group. (I gave examples of this too.)

I briefly explained the ‘whys’ behind the guidelines.  All in all, this took about two minutes to explain.  This wise investment of time made for a more calm, pleasant environment even though more children were present this week.

The Bible story was reviewed in a more engaging way.

The leader did a fabulous job engaging the children while reviewing the story.  She asked great questions (mentioned here).  She also kept children engaged by regularly referring to them by name.

The leader was more aware of when it was time to change things up a bit.

Because the children were more within her eyesight, she was able to notice when children were getting restless.  When she noticed this, she changed things up a bit.  How?  Read on…

The children were able to move around after the discussion time.

Last week, I suggested that the children get up and move around after the discussion time on the floor.  She had them complete their journal activity at the table before doing a Bible verse activity at the whiteboard.  It was very effective.  Changing up the ‘scenery’ came at just the right time because she was more aware – and prepared.

The leader was more confident.

I wish you could have been there.  Her voice was surer and her posture more upright.  She was prepared with her ‘cheat sheet”.  She was more relaxed.  Her body language screamed, “I can do this!”  It was such a God-thing to see this after just one week.

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My goal in coaching this sweet leader was to not only help the children have a great time but also to help her strengthen her leadership muscles.  I think she’s on the right track!  Moving forward, I suggested that she:

1. Take time at the beginning of each session to briefly review the guidelines.

2. Have fidgety children sit on either side of you or directly across from you.  This will allow you to correct behavior with a gentle hand on a shoulder or eye contact.

3. Sit where you can see the clock.  This will help you keep track of time. (Note: There is no clock in this leader’s area, but there will be next week!)

4. Break up your 30 minutes into three 10-minute segments.

5. Build anticipation for next week with comments like, “I can’t wait to see you again next week!” or “Next week, we’ll ____. I hope to see you then!” or “If you come next week, you’ll hear more about ____.”

Now it’s your turn to share…How do you coach your small group leaders to lead effectively? Post your tips below!

Orange Tour Notes (Part 2)

Yesterday, I shared notes from the recent Orange Tour in Washington, D.C.  You can find those notes here.  Today, I will share my notes from the two breakout sessions I attended.

Breakout #1 – “No More Sunday School” – Kristen Ivy and Colette Taylor

Traditional Sunday school was established in the 1700’s during the Industrial Revolution.  It’s primary reason for existence was to help kids become literate since they didn’t attend school.  In 1870, all kids started to attend school so churches no longer needed to help kids with literacy.

Today, kids spend an average of 32.5 hours in a classroom environment.  Do we want Sunday school to reflect another classroom environment?

We should consider shifting from a Sunday school model to a spiritual formation model.

What if we didn’t just think about content for the church?  What if we thought about how we could tap into the day-to-day influence of the home?  (Remember, kids spend an average of 40 hours/yr at church and 3,000 hours/yr with their parents.)

What if we didn’t just think about what we would teach next Sunday? What if we thought strategically about a plan from preschool to college?

What if we didn’t just recruit volunteers who can teach?  What if we sought out focused leaders who can embody the strategy?

What if we thought less about teaching the Bible to kids and more about teaching kids the Bible?

What if we didn’t spend all of our focus on content?  What if we also spent the same amount of energy on how we package that content so it will be relevant?

Helpful Resources to Consider (not mentioned at the conference):

Good to Great by Jim Collins

Making Your Children’s Ministry the Best Hour of Every Kid’s Week by Sue Miller and David Staal

Sticky Faith by Kara Powell and Chap Clark

The Fabulous Reinvention of Sunday School by Aaron Reynolds

Breakout #2 – “Lead Small for Kids:  Connecting with Kids Relationally” – Kristen Ivy and Colette Taylor

*Note:  The ideas shared piggy-backed on what Reggie Joiner shared in Session 2 about Small Group Leader “To-Do’s”.

1. Be present.  Show up mentally.

  • Think about the discussion questions ahead of time.
  • Pray for the kids.
  • Turn off your cell phone.

2. Create a safe place.  Guard the heart.

  • Report when kids are hurting someone, someone is hurting them, or they’re hurting themselves.

3. Partner with parents.  Cue the parents.

  • Communicate in more than one way.  Utilize your church’s website, email, phone calls, social media such as Facebook, Twitter or Pinterest.

4. Make it personal.  Be real.

  • Share your story.
  • Be okay with not knowing the answer.  Simply say, “I don’t know.  Let’s look it up together.”

5. Move them out.  What’s next?

  • Be sensitive to transition times in your ministry (preschool to elementary, elementary to middle school, middle school to high school).
  • Hand kids up well.
  • Set new leaders up to win by contacting their new small group leader.
  • Consider moving up with your group.
  • Encourage the spiritual journey.

Did you attend the Orange Tour breakouts?  What stood out to you the most?

Orange Tour Notes (Part 1)

Last week, I attended the Orange Tour at National Community Church in Washington, D.C.    The theme was “Lead Change…Lead Small.”  The first half of the day was spent talking about leading change (in various ways) while the second half of the day spoke to the importance of small groups and leading small groups.

It was my very first time hearing Reggie Joiner speak and I thoroughly enjoyed the passion and inspiration that his talks offered.  He spoke for all three main sessions.  In addition, I attended two breakout sessions that corresponded to the theme.  Here are my notes from all three main sessions.  (I will post the breakout notes tomorrow.)

Opening Session – “Lead Change” – Reggie Joiner

Change is not an option, but how you respond to it is.

3 Possible Responses to Change:

1. Ignore it and drift nowhere.

2. Hold on and let it drive you where you don’t want to go.

3. Make an adjustment and use it to get where you want to go.

When you lead change you decide to make adjustments to present methods for the sake of a sacred mission.

25% of Americans treat Sunday like a holy day.  Everybody else treats Sunday like a holiday.  What if you stopped counting the people who come to your church every Sunday and started counting the people who don’t?

If you don’t change, you run the risk of being:

  • Irrelevant
  • Disconnected
  • Ineffective

It’s time to change:

  • How we treat every FAMILY
  • How we communicate our MESSAGE
  • How we develop LEADERS
  • How we prioritize for SMALL GROUPS
  • How we DISCIPLE a generation
  • How we redefine the CHURCH

“At some point, most of us stop doing ministry out of our imagination and start doing it from memory.”  Mark Batterson, Pastor of National Community Church

Session 2 – “Lead Small” – Reggie Joiner 

Our strategy doesn’t matter if God is not a part.

What you do for a FEW will always have more potential than what you do for MANY.

If you are a small group leader, it’s just as important that you know what you ARE NOT as that you know what YOU ARE.

Nothing is a substitute for relationships.

  • God created us for community.
  • Jesus illustrated community.
  • The Church practiced community.

(1 Thessalonians 2:8)

Small Group Leader “To Do’s”:

1. Be present.  Connect their faith to a community by:

  • Showing up predictably (consistently)
  • Showing up mentally (coming prepared)
  • Showing up randomly (at events important to the child)

2. Create a safe place.  Clarify their faith as they grow by:

  • Leading the group
  • Respecting the process
  • Guarding the heart

3. Partner with parents.  Nurture an everyday faith by:

  • Cuing the parents (parents should know the plan)
  • Honoring the parents
  • Reinforcing the family (do not compete with family time)

4. Make it personal.  Inspire their faith by your example by:

  • Living in community–your small group of kids is NOT it!
  • Setting priorities
  • Being real

5. Moving them out.  Engage their faith in a bigger story by:

  • Moving them to someone else
  • Moving them to be the Church
  • Moving them to what’s next

You should start packing a student’s bags the day he or she shows up.  The goal isn’t to keep them; the goal is to launch them.

Session 3 – “Personal Challenge” – Reggie Joiner

We should not SIGN UP for ministry; we should be CALLED to ministry.

There’s no way to do what you do without getting messy.

There was no way for Jesus to do what He did without getting messy (John 6:53-54)

The Gospel is messy because the cross was messy.

There’s no way to make disciples without THEM getting messy.

Jesus did not call to you to follow Him to safety.  Jesus called you to take up a cross and engage in a MISSION.

When serving your children, you have two choices:

  • You can protect them; or
  • You can engage them.

Did you attend the Orange Tour?  What impacted you the most?