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Resolve Conflicts With L.O.V.E

CM Magazine Jan-Feb16

In the January/February 2016 issue of Children’s Ministry Magazine, I wrote about training children to resolving conflict in a God-honoring way.  I thought I’d share a behind-the-scenes insight into why I wrote about this important task.

This month, we celebrate the life of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., who led the Civil Rights movement from the mid-1950’s until he was assassinated in 1968.  Through all of this efforts toward peace, Dr. King’s platform was based on nonviolence.

Children today are exposed to more violent images than ever before.  Sadly, these images are everywhere our children are: television, movies, phone and tablet screens, and video games.  What breaks my heart even more is that many children experience violence first-hand in their own homes and communities day after day.

I believe that helping children resolve conflict in a healthy way will help them work through down the road.  Whenever my own children have had sibling squabbles or see my husband and I disagree about something, I remind them that healthy conflict resolution will serve them well in relationships with family members, friends, bosses, and their future spouse and children.

Our churches (and homes) are fertile training soil for us to build on.  In the current issue, I share 4 ways that we can do that.  If you are a subscriber, you’ll find my column on page 30.  (There is even a very cute printable bookmark that you can download online.)  If you’re not a subscriber, consider becoming one.  You can find out you can save 70% off here.

Let’s help our children resolve conflicts with love!

16 Books on My 2016 Reading List

2016 reading list

Happy New Year, friends!  I hope you’ve had a great (albeit short) start to 2016!

A new year brings so many possibilities, doesn’t it?  It’s a time most of us reflect on what we’ve done, what we’d like to do.  Many of us aim to do more of this, less of that

I have always loved to read.  Whether for pleasure or professional development, reading has been one of my favorite hobbies since I was a teenager.  In 2015, I read more than I have in recent years.  Not because I had more time (I didn’t) but because I made it more of a priority.  Every day.

One of my goals for 2016 is to continue to feed my soul through books.

I have chosen 16 books to read in 2016:

For The Love by Jen Hatmaker (I started this book in 2015 – looking forward to finishing)

Move: Nine Conversations to Build Your Kids Ministry by Brannon Marshall

Leading & Loving It: Encouragement for Pastors’ Wives and Women in Leadership by Lori Wilhite and Brandi Wilson

Team Up! The Family Ministry Playbook for Partnering with Parents by Phil Bell

Every Child Welcome: A Ministry Handbook for Including Kids With Special Needs by Katie Wetherbee and Jolene Philo

Do Over by Jon Acuff

The Fringe Hours by Jessica Turner

Teams That Thrive by Kal Otis and Michelle Marx

7 Family Ministry Essentials by Michelle Anthony and Megan Marshman

Wholly Kids by LifeWay Kids

The Bee Eater by Richard Whitmire

Dear Mary by Sarah Jakes Roberts

Tweetable Leadership by Jim Wideman

Audacious by Beth Moore

The Effective Executive by Peter Drucker

Your Beautiful Purpose by Susie Larson

What’s on your “To Read” list for 2016?  Leave me a comment and let me know!

Money-Saving KidMin Black Friday Bargains

Black Friday bargains

 

Every kidmin leader I know wants to (and often needs to) stretch their ministry dollars.  I’ve scoured the internet for awesome Black Friday deals that will help you do just that.  Here’s what I found:

WORSHIP RESOURCES

WorshipHouse Kids is a go-to for kidmin leaders looking for affordable, high-quality worship media resources.  If you’re looking for worship videos, motion backgrounds, or seasonal countdowns for short videos to complement your lessons, this is the place to shop.  Black Friday specials include $2.98 motion backgrounds and $4.98 kids’ videos.

Yancy is well-known in kidmin circles for the great worship music she provides for children.  Her website is filled with great deals on devotionals, CDs, videos, even apparel.

PRETEENS/YOUTH MINISTRY

I love using youth ministry games with our preteens!  Download Youth Ministry (DYM) is one of the places I’ve found them.  DYM is offering a coupon for 40% off anything in their store.  Just use coupon code thanks.

iShine is offering a Tween Central Resource kit (filled with music, books, bibles, videos, t-shirts, and trinkets) for just $48 (it’s normally priced at $149.99).

CURRICULUM/BIBLES/BOOKS

Standard Publishing is offering 25% off online orders today – curriculum, bibles, books and more!  Use promo code 1DAY15.

What’s in the Bible? is offering up 30% off orders over $30.  Stock up on curriculum, church bundles and DVD gift sets.  *Note: This is an affiliate link.

Children’s Ministry Deals is where I’ve found free seasonal Minute-to-Win-It games and printables, along with curriculum bundles.  Today, they’re offering bundle deals on curriculum.  (You can grab free downloads, too!)

LifeWay is offering sales on kids’ books, DVDs, and Veggie Tales toys.  Shop online or in the store.

Group Publishing is offering a clearance sale on all sorts of goodies.  You don’t want to pass this up!

VBS

Regular Baptist Press is offering deals on VBS kits and nursery curriculum plus get free shipping on pre-paid orders of $125 or more.  Use promo code SALE15.

ALL-IN-ONE BUNDLES

Kidzmatter Pro is offering over $10,000 worth of kidmin resources for only $99/yr!  You’ll receive conference videos, games, curriculum, videos, countdowns, worship music, and more.

CRAFT SUPPLIES (AND MORE!)

If you’re in kidmin, I’m sure you’re very familiar with Oriental Trading!  Today, they’re offering free shipping plus $10 off orders of $59 or more.  Use promo code CE155080.

Lakeshore Learning (a teacher’s paradise) has great bargains in-store and online.

LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT

If you’re looking for coaching that can help you lead your ministry better, Ryan Frank’s Inner Circle is the program for you.  You’ll receive personal coaching, access to online material and participation with other others in an online community.  Launching in January 2016, this opportunity will be offered for $249/yr.  However, if you grab it today, you’ll only pay $99/yr!  Check it out.

I have never attended the Children’s Pastors’ Conference (CPC) but I have friends who have and they love it!  Save up to 50% off your 2016 registration fee today!

Jim Wideman has provided resources for kidmin leaders for over 30 years.  He is offering an additional 10% off his books through the end of November.  He is also offering 10% off his personal coaching sessions (more info about that here).  Use coupon code GET10.

What did I miss?  What great bargains did YOU find?  Share them in the comments below!

Breast Cancer Awareness – My Story

Keep calm get a mammogram

When I turned 40 a year and a half ago, my mom said, “Don’t forget to schedule your mammogram.  You’re 40 now.  You need to have one.”

What?  What was I hearing?  A mammogram?  Wasn’t that something that old(er) women had done?  Surely, as a 40 year-old woman, I was definitely too young to need one of those, right?  Nope.  (Why did I ever doubt my mom?)

I waited and waited.  You know…I was busy.  I’ll get around to it, I told myself.

As my 41st birthday neared, my mom urged me – again – to go and get a mammogram.  Reluctantly I made an appointment to have it while I was still 40.  Otherwise, as she pointed out, I would be two mammograms behind when I turned 41.

The procedure itself was relatively painless and was over in no time.  During the procedure, the technician informed me that because I had no baseline for comparison, I shouldn’t be surprised if I get a callback for a second test.  Ok, I thought.

A week later, I received a letter in the mail that mentioned something suspicious was detected and that I needed to return for further testing.  This news wasn’t really what I had expected when I was told not to be surprised if I needed to return for further testing.  I imagined going back because they couldn’t see something clearly, not because something looked suspicious.  The next step was an ultrasound.

Fast forward a few weeks…

The ultrasound confirmed that there was indeed a clearly defined mass (it looked like a chewed piece of bubble gum to me) and that a biopsy was the next step to determine if it was cancerous.  Biopsy??  This was getting more serious.  I left my appointment, went to my car, called my husband at work and as soon as I heard his voice, I burst into tears.  (No one ever said my timing or delivery was always perfect.)  He was able to understand my words through muffled tears and his words soothed me enough to pull myself together.  Then I began texting and emailing my family and friends to go to God on my behalf and pray for a benign tumor.

Fast forward a few weeks…

After the biopsy, four days passed before I received a phone call with the results.  A phone call that could’ve changed my life forever.  I’m a pretty optimistic person but honestly, God heard from me a lot that week!  And boy – my poor husband.  He is normally very even-keeled but he, too, was also pretty concerned.  He tried to be strong for both of us.  I love him so much.  (The funny thing is that before he left for work on the morning I received the phone call, he prayed a prayer over me like he’s never done before.  It left me speechless!  God used him to calm my nerves that morning.)

I was relieved when the call came in and I found out the test came back negative.  I was cancer-free!  Praise God!  My mom, who was in the car with me when I got the call, started screaming and praising God right then and there!  (I’ll never forget that moment EVER!)  I didn’t hear much after, “Kathie, I have good news for you”, but I was so relieved that God had answered my prayers.

Because of the size and location of the tumor, my doctor recommended that I have the tumor removed, but the ultimate decision was mine to make.  After doing some research, I decided to have the tumor removed after our church’s VBS wrapped up.

The morning of my surgery, I felt good and confident, ready to put this ordeal behind me.  With my husband and children by my side, we arrived at the hospital, checked in and waited…waiting is so hard, isn’t it?

Have you ever been in a place of anticipation and waiting?

My surgery went well, with no complications, although no one told me about the horrible nausea that followed.  The day after surgery was also tougher than I expected.  I was in an incredible amount of pain, had a sore throat (I was intubated prior to surgery), nausea and sleepiness.  Thankfully, I was able to take a week to just recover – it took 7 full days for me to begin to feel like myself again.

Why did I share my story?

I share my story because God answered my prayers!  I am so thankful for insurance, supportive family and friends and knowledgeable doctors and medical personnel.

I share this story because God often uses unexpected situations to draw us – and those around us – closer to him.  I had so many people praying for me, texting me encouraging words and sharing their stories of going through a similar experience.  We grew closer to God and each other through that scary time.

I share my story because two friends who had put off their own mammograms went to have theirs done.  If my story could help one person, yay!

I share my story because rest did my body a lot of good.  I was really a non-functioning member of society for the days following my surgery.  All I could do was take pain meds and sleep.  And that was alright with me.

I share my story because oftentimes, we don’t listen as intently about issues that haven’t affected us or someone we care about.  I have learned so much through this process and want to help others learn, too.

Needless to say, this year I’m paying more attention to stories about breast cancer awareness.  Last week on the Today Show, I saw a segment that the American Cancer Society is now recommending mammograms start for women at age 45, not age 40.  (I have no family history of breast cancer, but had I waited, my story could’ve ended very differently.)

I encourage you to take care of yourself, go get a mammogram and/or encourage someone you love to get theirs.  You have too much to live for to skip it!

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